Sure Signs You're Dealing With Bracket Guy
We all know this guy. He shows up, like clockwork, every year around the middle of March.
#01
He keeps several different brackets on him at all times with every possible outcome filled in, so he can brag about whatever happens.
#02
He's only a fan from March 16th until whenever his brackets go to complete sh*t.
#03
He insists that Gonzaga is still an underdog overachiever in the tourney.
#04
His entire bracket is wild Cinderella picks.
#05
He throws around the terms SOS, RPI, and Sagarin without knowing what the f*ck he's saying.
#06
He played JV ball so he "understands the game."
#07
He insists that college ball is better than professional, because they "play with such heart."
#08
He regurgitates whatever clueless ESPN analysts say.
#09
He always agonizes over which 12 seed to pick in the first round.
#10
He maintains that Drake is this year's George Mason.
#11
He "really likes Pitt this year."
#12
He thinks a 10 over a 7 is an upset.
#13
He's telling everyone he knows that he picked that 10 over 7 "upset."
#14
He isn't telling everyone he knows that the other three 10s he picked all lost.
#15
He gets incredible, inexplicable hunches about random teams: "I dunno, I just have a feeling about Western Kentucky."
#16
Even though they still lost, Bracket Guy claims credit for "almost picking" Belmont over Duke.
#17
He likes lanky white guys with indie rock hair from the Pacific Northwest who launch threes.
(See: Gonzaga.)
#18